Nothing fires me up more than someone hurting people I love. The last few hours have been really stressful for absolutely no reason whatsoever and it pisses me off. I have managed to cut a lot of stress and drama out of my life in the past year, and I just refuse to play the game. That’s right. I am taking my ball and I’m going home. Suck it.
I am a really direct person. I don’t do passive aggressive. I’m not a combative person, but if you step on my toes, I will let you know. I spent too many years letting someone walk over me to do that any more. In my advanced age, I have decided that I just don’t have that kind of time. Also, having a heart attack at 35 years old that was 100% stress induced makes the little things that much dumber. It just isn’t worth it. This has meant removing myself from toxic situations AND toxic people. Even family.
Family is an interesting concept. Somewhere along the way, we came up with the idea that you can’t get away from your family. I call shenanigans on that business. If people won’t respect you as a human being and show you the same respect they would show a stranger, I say they aren’t worth the time or stress. Let me rewind for a second before I start WWIII and mention that I am NOT talking about my family (this time). Repeat: If you are reading this and related to me, I am probably NOT talking about you. I have divorced a few people who share my DNA over the years, I’m not going to lie. But this isn’t about me.
Guilt is another interesting concept to me. Families LOVE guilt. “Make sure you come see Grandma… she may be dead soon!” WTF is that about?? Shouldn’t I WANT to go see Grandma just for the pleasure of her company? And if you have to guilt me to get me there, do you really want me there? Social media has really made Passive Aggressive Guilting into a competitive sport. People feel no shame in saying things to people online that they would never say to their face. Cowards. I don’t do guilt. I have given it up for my health. We all make choices in life that we have to live with. Here’s a tip – If you can’t live with it, don’t do it. I have made mistakes in my life (BOY, have I!), but I can’t live in a land of guilt. I made a mistake and I have to life with the consequences of my own actions. BUT, I also choose to learn from those mistakes. The bottom line is this: The first time, it is a mistake. The second (and so on) time, it is a CHOICE. So, I don’t do guilt.
But what really eats me up is someone else trying to guilt you into doing what they want. Sorry folks, but that is called manipulation, and it is creepy and wrong. Get over yourself. Calling someone out on a public forum, knowing that anything they say in response makes THEM look like a jerk is a shitty thing to do. Especially to your family. And then to tell that person that THEY are disrespectful… suck it. I don’t buy into this crap, but other people do. People I love. People who are too nice to call you out on your shit. People who are massively hurt by the insinuation that not giving in to your demands makes them a bad person.
You want to see a mama bear come out and play? Mess with someone I care about. I can’t stand bullies. I don’t care how old they are, or if they are related to you. Bullying is cowardly and just plain wrong. I will always stand up for those who can’t stand up for themselves. I think I learned that from my uncle. The only reason bullies have power is that people allow them to keep that power. People are allowed to get away with this kind of behavior because they are old, or they have some imagined place of power, but in the end, it is just plain wrong. If someone doesn’t stand up to them, it will always be this way and then everybody loses.
I am a fair person. I believe in treating others the way THEY want to be treated. I believe in giving people a chance to show their true colors. I also believe there is a time to cut your losses and move on to a happier place. So, that is what I am doing. I am not going to play games, and I am not going to see my loved ones in pain because they attempted for once to stand up to the guilt trips and manipulations and got attacked for it. If more people stood up to the bullies of the world, we would probably have a much happier society.
What’s sick is that everyone agrees a kid being bullied at school is bad and shouldn’t be tolerated. Most people understand that bullying in the workplace is not ok. Why is it somehow acceptable for bullies to run amok because they are family? Riddle me that, Batman.
So please take your drama elsewhere. Stop defending the bullying behavior as somehow acceptable. And OMG if I hear one more person playing the martyr role, I will vomit on their shoes. Don’t tempt me, I will TOTALLY do it. Just grow up and live your words. Words like “family”, “love”, “generosity”, and “respect” don’t mean a damn thing if you aren’t walking the talk.
I promise my next post will be more entertaining, but it’s my blog and I honestly needed to vent. And now I am back to the happy place. Tomorrow will be a fantastic day and we will continue to live a genuine life while treating the people we care about better than random strangers off the street – because they deserve it.
As always, feel free to post your own Bitchfest Wednesday rant below in the comments section!