That is usually where the meds are administered.

I have been thinking a lot lately about dreams.  Not some Freudian dream interpretative crap, but your aspirations – your wishes.  Have you really thought about what you want to be when you grow up?

When I was little, I used to dream about becoming a Marine Biologist.  I wanted to study sharks.  Really, I have always been obsessed with sharks.  The only problem is that I have a pretty serious fear of drowning… especially after my sister nearly drowned me in the neighbor’s pool when we were kids.  It was an accident, of course.  And what kind of neighbor randomly lets little kids play in their pool without supervision?  Anyway… that pretty much killed any real ambition to get eaten by Jaws.

I’m pretty sure the progression of my career ambitions went something like this: Fire Hydrant. Bert & Ernie. Doctor. Marine Biologist. Hair Dresser. Lawyer. Not a lawyer… You get the picture.

As I got older, I kind of fell into Psychology due to my personality (as a smartass) and the fact that people are constantly coming to me with their problems, whether I want them to or not.  But a Bachelors in Psych and a couple of bucks gets you a weirdly named drink at that coffee place.  I decided to get my Master’s degree in Industrial Organizational Psychology… because it’s cool.  And you have no idea what that is.  Since you have no idea what that is, and neither do my bosses, it is basically the psychology of the workplace.  I love the work that I do… most of the time.  But the big question is this – Do I want to always work for someone who has NO idea what I am supposed to be doing, thereby overloading me with stupid projects I hate?


So, I wonder to myself… and anyone who will listen… what is out there for me.  The answer – Anything I am willing to go get.  I am a big believer in dreaming big.  There are no big rewards without big risks.  I have always been terrified of risk.  It’s just so… risky [shudder].  But the truth is this – I will never get where I want to go unless I go for it.  So, that is what I am doing.  I am creating my own happily ever after, damn it!

But, there is a very. very fine line between ambition and being completely off your rocker.  I’m talking to you, Charlie Sheen.  Oh yes.  With your tiger blood, Adonis DNA and your “Duh”s, you have completely captivated me with your crazy.  I think that at some point, dreaming big does need a tether to reality.  Because there are things I CAN’T do.  I can’t shoot myself (or annoying tv personality types) into space.  Oh, believe me… I have been trying to get an engineer on board with building that human space canon for YEARS (if you are interested in the project, just email me at – Accepting applications and grants!).  But, the question remains – Am I all that, or am I nuts?

I want you to dream BIG.  What are the things you would LOVE to do… and how can you realistically achieve them?  Remember, goals should be specific, measurable, action-oriented, realistic, and time-bound.  Otherwise, they are just wishes.  And you know what they say about wishes and assholes…

And, C.S., if you happen to be reading this – Get your tiger blood, booze-soaked ass back to the set because I need my Monday night TV line up.  What else will I watch while I am taking over the world??  Oh, that’s right – Big Bang Theory.


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